A Place to Breathe

Posted on Thu Sep 10th, 2026 @ 5:22am by Lieutenant M'Vatha Saelia Wadtai

2,615 words; about a 13 minute read

Mission: Into Our Past
Location: Deck 2, Chief Counselor's Cabin

Saelia watched the number vanish from the turbolift display before entering the hallway. Although she had been aboard the Chimera for a short period of time, she had already suspected that nearly nothing regarding this mission was going to look like what she expected. Her commanding officer greeted her with her uniform unzipped; told her that calling her Captain was unnecessary; told her that members of the crew may attempt to proposition her; and then stated that she and her girlfriend may also be among those attempting to proposition her. At this point, Saelia was still trying to determine which portion of that sequence she found most absurd. A slight grin appeared on her face.

"Sexy step-mom," she whispered to herself. There are some Human phrases that no amount of Xeno cultural studies can properly prepare you for.

However, beneath Cally's humour and deliberate informality, Saelia saw something that she knew quite well. Cally loved her crew. Not in the same way that a commanding officer would express pride in a successful ship, but in the protective manner of someone who views the people working aboard the Chimera as family. This intrigued Saelia.

In addition to the stories behind the personnel files she read. However, those could wait. For now, she desired water. The special hydration layer beneath her uniform was performing adequately, however, Saelia had spent too many hours traveling, transitioning aboard, finding her way around an unfamiliar ship, and reporting to her new commanding officer. The garment prevented dehydration.

However, it did not provide immersion. Fortunately, Cally told her that engineering had nearly finished modifying the environment in her quarters. Saelia intended to find out what nearly meant. All Starfleet hallways appear identical until they do not. There are variations, naturally. Vessels from differing classes have different dimensions, different lighting, and different arrangements of intersections and access points. Older vessels acquire scratches in areas where newer vessels have yet to discover that they can acquire scratches. Generally speaking, however, Saelia thought that it is primarily the people who create differences.

Eventually, she will identify this hallway by whom she typically encounters walking down it. She will recognize which door opens each morning at exactly the same time; which neighbour arrives back late from duty; and which part of the bulkhead someone regularly leans against when discussing matters.

Today, it was just Deck Two. She verified the cabin number again and proceeded. Her luggage arrived prior to hers. That was reassuring. Two suitcases rested adjacent to the entrance to her allotted quarters; in addition to a significantly larger sealed container displaying Aqald transport labels and numerous warnings pertaining to environmental sensitivity. Saelia halted. The larger container she instantly recognized. "At least something from home made it here unharmed." She pressed the button to release the door. The doors split apart. For the first time, Lieutenant M'vatha Saelia Nura Wadtai entered the area aboard the USS Chimera that was supposed to become home. Saelia remained standing for several seconds. Assigning quarters on the first day is always somewhat odd. The quarters include all the items Starfleet believes are necessary for someone to reside there; yet none of them suggest that anyone actually does. Furniture Storage Workstation Replicator Small Kitchenette Saelia was particularly pleased to see this given her opinions regarding replicated Aruilaen food.

Everything was clean; orderly; and entirely impersonal. "Computer, privacy." A gentle affirmation sounded. Only then did Saelia permit her shoulders to relax. She took a deep breath and instantly sensed the difference. Humidity Not excessively high enough to be uncomfortable for most humanoids, she believed; yet significantly higher than typical Starfleet environmental settings. Her skin recognized this even through the special hydration garment beneath her uniform. Which meant she could be in the cabin without the garment. She could let her skin breathe!

Saelia grinned. "That's encouraging." Cally indicated that the alterations were nearly complete. Throughout the years, Saelia learned that nearly can refer to a wide variety of circumstances when engineers are involved. She moved further into the room. Additional environmental controls were installed adjacent to the standard cabin interface; in addition to emergency hydration equipment and medical monitoring specifically tailored for Aruilaen physiology. Nothing too intrusive. Most of these components will likely be unnoticed by anyone who does not know what they are looking for. Someone clearly reviewed the specifications she submitted beforehand. Actually reviewed them. Saelia made a mental note to recall Cally's recommendation. Lieutenant Jade. If the remainder of the modifications are implemented as carefully as these, Saelia may find herself thanking her instead of requesting revisions.

First, however— She turned toward the luggage again. The two smaller cases were relatively easy to bring into the room. The third was a different story. It was not particularly graceful; neither was attempting to explain to a transporter technician why several containers of genuine Aqald water were important when replicators could reproduce water with precisely the same chemical composition. Saelia understood this argument. Scientifically, they were accurate. Emotionally, they were completely inaccurate.

She opened the environmental container. Home welcomed her back. Not literally, of course. For a moment, however, she could smell Aqald instead of recycled starship air. Carefully packaged containers of local foods consumed a large portion of the storage space. Fire Tubers Sundancer Grain Preserved Dragon Berries Roku Pear Preserves Greater Green Beans Several other ingredients she learned through experience were rarely satisfactory when replicated. There were bottles of Gftathuaft Ghasa' packed firmly into insulated compartments. Saelia removed one. She held it for a moment longer than necessary. Water.

To everyone else aboard the Chimera, that was all it represented. For Saelia it had fallen as rain beneath Aqald's sky; flowed through waterways she knew since childhood; and carried mineral traces from the world where centuries of her family had resided. She gently placed it in the kitchenette. There were also two bottles her father packed that her mother would undoubtedly assert were intended for special occasions. Saelia examined the labels. One eyebrow arched upward. "How many special occasions does Mother believe I intend to host?"

Predictably, the container provided no response. More personal items occupied the smaller cases. Clothes came first. Books followed; in addition to a collection of small polished stones each wrapped individually. Saelia unwrapped these more carefully than she did the bottles. Each stone held a story. Some originated from worlds where she served. Some were gifted to her by friends, coworkers, or patients over the years. One tiny grey stone travelled with her for so long that she could no longer recall precisely when she began carrying it. She arranged them along a shelf.

Not flawlessly. Perfect arrangements resemble displays. These represent memories. Journals followed. Not PADDs. Actual handwritten journals followed. There were so many journals that Saelia considered abandoning this practice briefly as she moved them into storage beside her desk. "Perhaps documenting personal logs is not entirely devoid of purpose." She stared at the stack. "No." Some things are not intended for storage in a computer. A set of Aruilaen writing utensils followed. Three pieces of art followed. A small carved figurine from Aqald followed.

Finally, a framed photograph followed. Saelia halted. Her family gazed back at her. Her parents sat in the center of the photograph surrounded by their offspring and increasing complexity of spouses, nieces, and nephews created as Saelia's older siblings established families. And there she stood. The second youngest sibling. Saelia ran her thumb lightly across the perimeter of the frame. Her mother recently commenced making increasingly unsubtle comments about this distinction. Her brothers are married. Her sister is married. Children exist. Saelia possesses Starfleet. Given her youth, this is hardly exceptional by Aruilaen standards.

Assuming that the universe cooperates, she has centuries of life remaining. That does not deter mothers from acting like mothers. "You are remaining there," Saelia informed the photograph. She placed it prominently on a shelf. Not hidden beside the bed. Not stowed away privately somewhere. Her family represents part of her existence. She has never perceived any reason to feign otherwise. Adjacent to it she placed another item. Smaller. More private. The emblem of Shrreewasa rested lightly in her hand. Saelia studied it before placing it in a quieter corner of the room partially obscured by one piece of Aqald art. She does not conceal her beliefs. Nor does she promote them publicly. Some aspects of an individual's life belong solely between the individual and the divine. "There." She stepped backward.

Although the cabin still appeared distinctively Starfleet, there were now elements of Saelia present within it. At this time that was sufficient. Her gaze shifted toward the adjoining doorway. The immersion room. Everything else suddenly appeared considerably less significant. Cally specifically indicated that the quarters were nearly complete. Saelia has yet to examine the modification upon which most of those specifications were based. She traversed the cabin and entered the adjoining room. Then stopped. "Oh." The word escaped before she could prevent it. A smile slowly appeared upon her face. Someone listened. Saelia fully entered the immersion room. It was not a swimming pool. That distinction matters. She loves swimming—proper swimming—preferably with sufficient open water around her that she can select a direction and continue moving forward indefinitely. No private cabin aboard a starship could possibly supply that; and Saelia has never requested that Starfleet attempt to do so. This is different. This is a location where she can breathe. The immersion pool consumed most of the room; deep enough for Saelia to immerse herself completely without contorting herself awkwardly against the floor. Broad steps descended below the surface at one end; while a submerged ledge extended along part of the wall permitting her somewhere to sit or rest while remaining underwater.

Saelia approached the environmental controls. Temperature Humidity Filtration Mineral Composition Oxygenation She worked through each reading one by one. The water chemistry had been adjusted according to the specifications she provided prior to her transfer. Not merely general settings appropriate for an aquatic humanoid; but settings designed specifically for Aruilaen physiology. That distinction matters as well. Her fingers touched the surface. Warm water enveloped them. Saelia crouched beside the pool and lowered her hand farther into the water; observing faint ripples spread outward. She raised moist hands to her lips. Close.

Her eyebrows arched upward. Very close. Not Aqald Nothing aboard a starship can replicate home accurately regardless of what replicator specifications claim. Water conveys more than its chemical composition. Temperature Minerals Currents Depth — Even life within water contributes to something Saelia has never successfully conveyed to individuals who spent their lives inhaling air.

However, someone prepared this attempt. More importantly, they understood that close enough to survive and comfortable enough to live are not equivalent statements. "Computer, confirm the identity of the officer responsible for environmental modifications to these quarters." The computer displayed work order information. Lieutenant Jade's name appeared among it. Saelia smiled. "Cally was correct about you." She made a mental note to locate lieutenant later. Not because something is amiss. Because something is correct. Individuals hear about their errors continuously.

Saelia has never comprehended why compliments are frequently treated as if they are less significant. She straightened and surveyed her surroundings again. Emergency hydration equipment occupied a recessed compartment within easy reach. Environmental alarms were connected to both cabin computer and sickbay. Filtration system was adapted for extended periods of Aruilaen immersion; and storage exists for supplies necessary to maintain hydration garment requirements. Someone actually read everything. Saelia returned to living area. Luggage remained waiting. She stared at it. Then towards immersion room. Then back at luggage.

Technically speaking unpacking represents a responsible choice. She still had clothes to store away. Office awaited inspection on Deck Seven. Meet counseling staff she will supervise soon. Review department records; arrange appointments; and likely discover administrative surprises left behind by whoever occupied Chief Counselor position before her arrival. Locating Lieutenant Jade was also a priority. And locating Kally Kellerman to acquire Chimera's legendary relationship chart prior to inadvertently flirting with someone's wife; girlfriend; boyfriend; partner—or some combination thereof.

Been aboard less than hour. "Cally might have been accurate about divine intervention." Her gaze drifted toward water again. "Computer, when is my next scheduled duty requirement?" Answer appeared instantly. Saelia considered it carefully. There was plenty of time, and thus the remaining luggage lost argument. Few minutes later uniform hung appropriately Removing hydration garment beneath required longer Special layer invaluable while working in standard federation environments maintaining moisture required by body during extended periods away from water, she was of course grateful for it, she thoroughly disliked wearing it.

Saelia peeled final section away from skin exhaled in relief "Much better." Hair loosely secured rather than left completely loose stepped down into pool.

Water climbed over ankles, knees, waist, chest, then Saelia slipped beneath surface Everything changed. Constant background hum of Chimera softened into distant indistinct sound. Her body responded instinctively, inhaling air inhaling water differed experience. Neither required conscious thought any more than Humans typically considers each breath they take, and the transition between two created moment Saelia always enjoyed. She exhaled, then inhaled and water flowed through specialized structures of respiratory system. Oxygen entered blood, and tension she carried since leaving previous assignment began finally to relax Saelia sank toward submerged ledge settled there. And for several minutes she did nothing. No personnel files. No transfer orders. No Captain sitting behind desk with uniform unzipped. No new counseling department waiting for Chief. No patients. No expectations. Just Saelia. Closed eyes. The water was not Aqald, it was immediately apparent. It did not move properly. No distant currents or subtle changes in pressure, no aquatic life moving beyond edge of awareness, no vast expanse of water stretching away in every direction, but her lungs did not care, her skin did not care and for first time since commencing journey to Chimera her body was fully comfortable.

Thought emerged unexpectedly, They're family you know Cally's comments. Saelia opened her eyes, beyond shifting surface lay an unknown cabin aboard an unknown ship occupied by strangers. Family. The word meant specific concept to Saelia. Parents. One elder brother, One younger Brother and an elder Sister, their spouses, their children. And a sprawling collection of relationships extending across Aqald dating back generations. Family is not something one simply declares, it is built and maintained. Occasionally endured, and occasionally fled from for several months when mother begins discussing eligible unmarried Aruilaen males.

Saelia smiled underwater, Chimera's conception of family will clearly be distinct. Perhaps significantly distinct, but Cally believes in it. Saelia heard that beneath jokes and the flirting. People aboard this vessel have clearly been discarded underestimated or misjudged frequently enough that they have learned to create something unique from themselves. Saelia comprehended this better than expected.

Saelia gazed through water at photograph placed in other room, so far removed from Aqald. The ache will persist. She did not wish it to because missing home implies existence of place worthy of missing. However she may not require Chimera to become another Aqald. Saelia gently pushed away from ledge, her loose restraint released blue-green hair drifted around her as she navigated through water. New vessel. New crew. New Captain. And tomorrow an entire department of people who will undoubtedly ponder what manner of Chief Counselor that Starfleet imposed upon them. Saelia smiled, She would address tomorrow when it arrived, but for now she was just breathing and that was what this was for. And for first time since boarding USS Chimera Lieutenant M'vatha Saelia Nura Wadtai considered that perhaps she has found somewhere she can achieve precisely that.

 

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